The truth about restraining orders in Oklahoma

This video by the Dixie Chicks looks at the process of seeking protection against a violent partner in a more lighthearted fashion. But the scene in which the character, "Earl" busts through the paper, which is meant to represent a restraining order, is true to life.

When a victim is issued a restraining order, she breathes a sigh of relief, thinking that the person she most fears will abide by the order and stay away. In reality, it's just a piece of paper to most stalkers/abusers.



According to Rice Family Law, the definition of a restraining order is "A civil court order to protect a family or household member from physical abuse." That's it...a court order. It's a deterrent and in SOME cases, it works. But if your abuser or stalker is determined, it will not STOP him. The most effective way to arm yourself against any type of abuse is to become educated on the laws of your state and your sources for protection.

At WomensLaw.org, a list is provided for the stalking and domestic violence laws for individual states.

In Colorado, Gary Cunningham and his team of experts with Victim Protection, Inc provide assistance to victims for whom a protective order does not work.

In Oklahoma there is an organization that claims to help victims of domestic violence. Oklahoma Domestic Violence Help.

I'm not an expert on the law, but I'm told that there is a difference in the State of Oklahoma between a restraining order and a protective order. To obtain a protective order, the victim must prove that he/she is in danger of being physically harmed. Like the sigh of relief that a victim lets out when she is issued a restraining order, in Oklahoma, a permanent order of protection is dissolved after three years.

According to http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=permanent, the word "permanent" means:

Adjective

S: (adj) permanent, lasting (continuing or enduring without marked change in status or condition or place) "permanent secretary to the president"; "permanent address"; "literature of permanent value"
S: (adj) permanent (not capable of being reversed or returned to the original condition) "permanent brain damage"

In Oklahoma, the word "permanent" in association with a protective order means three years. Does that make sense?

Following is the Oklahoma statute in regards to protection from domestic violence. You can find it under Oklahoma Title 22:

This act shall be known and may be cited as the "Protection from Domestic Abuse Act".

Section 60.1 - Definitions

As used in the Protection from Domestic Abuse Act and in the Domestic Abuse Reporting Act, Sections 40.5 through 40.7 of this title and Section 150.12B of Title 74 of the Oklahoma Statutes:
1. "Domestic abuse" means any act of physical harm, or the threat of imminent physical harm which is committed by an adult, emancipated minor, or minor child thirteen (13) years of age or older against another adult, emancipated minor or minor child who are family or household members or who are or were in a dating relationship;
2. "Stalking" means the willful, malicious, and repeated following of a person by an adult, emancipated minor, or minor thirteen (13) years of age or older, with the intent of placing the person in reasonable fear of death or great bodily injury;
3. "Harassment" means a knowing and willful course or pattern of conduct by a family or household member or an individual who is or has been involved in a dating relationship with the person, directed at a specific person which seriously alarms or annoys the person, and which serves no legitimate purpose. The course of conduct must be such as would cause a reasonable person to suffer substantial emotional distress, and must actually cause substantial distress to the person. "Harassment" shall include, but not be limited to, harassing or obscene telephone calls in violation of Section 1172 of Title 21 of the Oklahoma Statutes and fear of death or bodily injury;
4. "Family or household members" means:
a. spouses,
b. ex-spouses,
c. present spouses of ex-spouses,
d. parents, including grandparents, stepparents, adoptive parents and foster parents,
e. children, including grandchildren, stepchildren, adopted children and foster children,
f. persons otherwise related by blood or marriage,
g. persons living in the same household or who formerly lived in the same household, and
h. persons who are the biological parents of the same child, regardless of their marital status, or whether they have lived together at any time. This shall include the elderly and handicapped;
5. "Dating relationship" means a courtship or engagement relationship. For purposes of this act, a casual acquaintance or ordinary fraternization between persons in a business or social context shall not constitute a dating relationship;
6. "Foreign protective order" means any valid order of protection issued by a court of another state or a tribal court;
7. "Rape" means rape and rape by instrumentation in violation of Sections 1111 and 1111.1 of Title 21 of the Oklahoma Statutes;
8. "Victim support person" means a person affiliated with a certified domestic violence or sexual assault program, certified by the Attorney General or certified by a recognized Native American Tribe if operating mainly within tribal lands, who provides support and assistance for a person who files a petition under the Protection from Domestic Violence Act; and
9. "Mutual protective order" means a final protective order or orders issued to both a plaintiff who has filed a petition for a protective order and a defendant included as the defendant in the plaintiff’s petition restraining the parties from committing domestic violence, stalking, harassment or rape against each other. If both parties allege domestic abuse, violence, stalking, harassment or rape against each other, the parties shall do so by separate petition pursuant to Section 60.4 of this title.

Section 60.2 - Protective Order - Petition, Form, Filing Fee, Preparation

A. A victim of domestic abuse, a victim of stalking, a victim of harassment, a victim of rape, any adult or emancipated minor household member on behalf of any other family or household member who is a minor or incompetent, or any minor age sixteen (16) or seventeen (17) years may seek relief under the provisions of the Protection from Domestic Abuse Act.


1. The person seeking relief may file a petition for a protective order with the district court in the county in which the victim resides, the county in which the defendant resides, or the county in which the domestic violence occurred. If the person seeking relief is a victim of stalking but is not a family or household member or an individual who is or has been in a dating relationship with the defendant, the person seeking relief must file a complaint against the defendant with the proper law enforcement agency before filing a petition for a protective order with the district court. The person seeking relief shall provide a copy of the complaint that was filed with the law enforcement agency at the full hearing if the complaint is not available from the law enforcement agency. Failure to provide a copy of the complaint filed with the law enforcement agency shall constitute a frivolous filing and the court may assess attorney fees and court costs against the plaintiff pursuant to paragraph 2 of subsection C of Section 60.2 of this title. The filing of a petition for a protective order shall not require jurisdiction or venue of the criminal offense if either the plaintiff or defendant resides in the county. If a petition has been filed in an action for divorce or separate maintenance and either party to the action files a petition for a protective order in the same county where the action for divorce or separate maintenance is filed, the petition for the protective order shall be heard by the court hearing the divorce or separate maintenance action. If the defendant is a minor child, the petition shall be filed with the court having jurisdiction over juvenile matters.



2. When the abuse occurs when the court is not open for business, such person may request an emergency temporary order of protection as authorized by Section 40.3 of this title.

B. The petition forms shall be provided by the clerk of the court. The Administrative Office of the Courts shall develop a standard form for the petition.

C. 1. Except as otherwise provided by this section, no filing fee, service of process fee, attorney fees or any other fee or costs shall be charged the plaintiff or victim at any time for filing a petition for a protective order whether a protective order is granted or not granted. The court may assess court costs, service of process fees, attorney fees, other fees and filing fees against the defendant at the hearing on the petition, if a protective order is granted against the defendant; provided, the court shall have authority to waive the costs and fees if the court finds that the party does not have the ability to pay the costs and fees.

2. If the court makes specific findings that a petition for a protective order has been filed frivolously and no victim exists, the court may assess attorney fees and court costs against the plaintiff.

D. The person seeking relief shall prepare the petition or, at the request of the plaintiff, the court clerk or the victim-witness coordinator, victim support person, and court case manager shall prepare or assist the plaintiff in preparing the petition.

Section 60.3 - Emergency Ex Parte Order - Hearing

A. If a plaintiff requests an emergency ex parte order pursuant to Section 60.2 of this title, the court shall hold an ex parte hearing on the same day the petition is filed, if the court finds sufficient grounds within the scope of the Protection from Domestic Abuse Act stated in the petition to hold such a hearing. The court may, for good cause shown at the hearing, issue any emergency ex parte order that it finds necessary to protect the victim from immediate and present danger of domestic abuse, stalking, or harassment. The emergency ex parte order shall be in effect until after the full hearing is conducted. Provided, if the defendant, after having been served, does not appear at the hearing, the emergency ex parte order shall remain in effect until the defendant is served with the permanent order. If the terms of the permanent order are the same as those in the emergency order, or are less restrictive, then it is not necessary to serve the defendant with the permanent order.
The Administrative Office of the Courts shall develop a standard form for emergency ex parte protective orders. B. An emergency ex parte protective order authorized by this section shall include the name, sex, race, date of birth of the defendant, and the dates of issue and expiration of the protective order.
C. If a plaintiff requests an emergency temporary ex parte order of protection as provided by Section 40.3 of this title, the judge who is notified of the request by a peace officer may issue such order verbally to the officer or in writing when there is reasonable cause to believe that the order is necessary to protect the victim from immediate and present danger of domestic abuse. When the order is issued verbally the judge shall direct the officer to complete and sign a statement attesting to the order. The emergency temporary ex parte order shall be in effect until the close of business on the next day the court is open for business after the order is issued.

Section 60.6 - Violation of Protective Order - Penalty

A. Except as otherwise provided by this section, any person who:
1. Has been served with an ex parte or final protective order or foreign protective order and is in violation of such protective order, upon conviction, shall be guilty of a misdemeanor and shall be punished by a fine of not more than One Thousand Dollars ($1,000.00) or by a term of imprisonment in the county jail of not more than one (1) year, or both such fine and imprisonment; and
2. After a previous conviction of a violation of a protective order, is convicted of a second or subsequent offense pursuant to the provisions of this section shall, upon conviction, be guilty of a felony and shall be punished by a term of imprisonment in the custody of the Department of Corrections for not less than one (1) year nor more than three (3) years, or by a fine of not less Two Thousand Dollars ($2,000.00) nor more than Ten Thousand Dollars ($10,000.00), or by both such fine and imprisonment.
B.
1. Any person who has been served with an ex parte or final protective order or foreign protective order who violates the protective order and causes physical injury or physical impairment to the plaintiff or to any other person named in said protective order shall, upon conviction, be guilty of a misdemeanor and shall be punished by a term of imprisonment in the county jail for not less than twenty (20) days nor more than one (1) year. In addition to the term of imprisonment, the person may be punished by a fine not to exceed Five Thousand Dollars ($5,000.00).
2. Any person who is convicted of a second or subsequent violation of a protective order which causes physical injury or physical impairment to a plaintiff or to any other person named in the protective order shall be guilty of a felony and shall be punished by a term of imprisonment in the custody of the Department of Corrections of not less than one (1) year nor more than five (5) years, or by a fine of not less than Three Thousand Dollars ($3,000.00) nor more than Ten Thousand Dollars ($10,000.00), or by both such fine and imprisonment.
3. In determining the term of imprisonment required by this section, the jury or sentencing judge shall consider the degree of physical injury or physical impairment to the victim.
4. The provisions of this subsection shall not affect the applicability of Sections 644, 645, 647 and 652 of Title 21 of the Oklahoma Statutes.
C. The minimum sentence of imprisonment issued pursuant to the provisions of paragraph 2 of subsection A and paragraph 1 of subsection B of this section shall not be subject to statutory provisions for suspended sentences, deferred sentences or probation, provided the court may subject any remaining penalty under the jurisdiction of the court to the statutory provisions for suspended sentences, deferred sentences or probation.
D. In addition to any other penalty specified by this section, the court shall require a defendant to undergo the treatment or participate in the counseling services necessary to bring about the cessation of domestic abuse against the victim or to bring about the cessation of stalking or harassment of the victim. For every conviction of violation of a protective order:
1. The court shall specifically order as a condition of a suspended sentence or probation that a defendant participate in counseling or undergo treatment to bring about the cessation of domestic abuse as specified in paragraph 2 of this subsection;
2. a. The court shall require the defendant to participate in counseling or undergo treatment for domestic abuse by an individual licensed practitioner or a domestic abuse counseling program approved by the court or a domestic abuse treatment program certified by the Attorney General. If the defendant is ordered to participate in a domestic abuse counseling or treatment program, the order shall require the defendant to attend the program for a minimum of fifty-two (52) weeks, complete the program, and be evaluated before and after attendance of the program by a program counselor or a private counselor.
b. A program for anger management, couples counseling, or family and marital counseling shall not solely qualify for the counseling or treatment requirement for domestic abuse pursuant to this subsection. The counseling may be ordered in addition to counseling specifically for the treatment of domestic abuse or per evaluation as set forth below. If, after sufficient evaluation and attendance at required counseling sessions, the domestic violence treatment program or licensed professional determines that the defendant does not evaluate as a perpetrator of domestic violence or does evaluate as a perpetrator of domestic violence and should complete other programs of treatment simultaneously or prior to domestic violence treatment, including but not limited to programs related to the mental health, apparent substance or alcohol abuse or inability or refusal to manage anger, the defendant shall be ordered to complete the counseling as per the recommendations of the domestic violence treatment program or licensed professional;
3. a. The court shall set a review hearing no more than one hundred twenty (120) days after the defendant is ordered to participate in a domestic abuse counseling program or undergo treatment for domestic abuse to assure the attendance and compliance of the defendant with the provisions of this subsection and the domestic abuse counseling or treatment requirements.
b. The court shall set a second review hearing after the completion of the counseling or treatment to assure the attendance and compliance of the defendant with the provisions of this subsection and the domestic abuse counseling or treatment requirements. The court shall retain continuing jurisdiction over the defendant during the course of ordered counseling through the final review hearing;
4. The court may set subsequent or other review hearings as the court determines necessary to assure the defendant attends and fully complies with the provisions of this subsection and the domestic abuse counseling or treatment requirements;
5. At any review hearing, if the defendant is not satisfactorily attending individual counseling or a domestic abuse counseling or treatment program or is not in compliance with any domestic abuse counseling or treatment requirements, the court may order the defendant to further or continue counseling, treatment, or other necessary services. The court may revoke all or any part of a suspended sentence, deferred sentence, or probation pursuant to Section 991b of Title 22 of the Oklahoma Statutes and subject the defendant to any or all remaining portions of the original sentence;
6. At the first review hearing, the court shall require the defendant to appear in court. Thereafter, for any subsequent review hearings, the court may accept a report on the progress of the defendant from individual counseling, domestic abuse counseling, or the treatment program. There shall be no requirement for the victim to attend review hearings; and
7. If funding is available, a referee may be appointed and assigned by the presiding judge of the district court to hear designated cases set for review under this subsection. Reasonable compensation for the referees shall be fixed by the presiding judge. The referee shall meet the requirements and perform all duties in the same manner and procedure as set forth in Sections 7003-8.6 and 7303-7.5 of Title 10 of the Oklahoma Statutes pertaining to referees appointed in juvenile proceedings.
E. Ex parte and final protective orders shall include notice of these penalties.
F. When a minor child violates the provisions of any protective order, the violation shall be heard in a juvenile proceeding and the court may order the child and the parent or parents of the child to participate in family counseling services necessary to bring about the cessation of domestic abuse against the victim and may order community service hours to be performed in lieu of any fine or imprisonment authorized by this section.
G. Any district court of this state and any judge thereof shall be immune from any liability or prosecution for issuing an order that requires a defendant to:
1. Attend a treatment program for domestic abusers certified by the Attorney General;
2. Attend counseling or treatment services ordered as part of any final protective order or for any violation of a protective order; and
3. Attend, complete, and be evaluated before and after attendance by a treatment program for domestic abusers certified by the Attorney General.
H. At no time, under any proceeding, may a person protected by a protective order be held to be in violation of that protective order. Only a defendant against whom a protective order has been issued may be held to have violated the order.

Section 60.11 - Statement Required on All Ex Parte or Final Protective Order

In addition to any other provisions required by the Protection from Domestic Abuse Act, or otherwise required by law, each ex parte or final protective order issued pursuant to the Protection from Domestic Abuse Act shall have a statement printed in bold-faced type or in capital letters containing the following information:
1. The filing or nonfiling of criminal charges and the prosecution of the case shall not be determined by a person who is protected by the protective order, but shall be determined by the prosecutor;
2. No person, including a person who is protected by the order, may give permission to anyone to ignore or violate any provision of the order. During the time in which the order is valid, every provision of the order shall be in full force and effect unless a court changes the order;
3. The order will be in effect for three (3) years unless extended, modified, vacated or rescinded by the court;
4. A violation of the order is punishable by a fine of up to One Thousand Dollars ($1,000.00) or imprisonment for up to one (1) year in the county jail, or by both such fine and imprisonment. A violation of the order which causes injury is punishable by imprisonment for twenty (20) days to one (1) year in the county jail or a fine of up to Five Thousand Dollars ($5,000.00), or by both such fine and imprisonment; and
5. Possession of a firearm or ammunition by a defendant while an order is in effect may subject the defendant to prosecution for a violation of federal law even if the order does not specifically prohibit the defendant from possession of a firearm or ammunition.

Section 60.15 - Notice of Victim's Rights

Upon the preliminary investigation of any crime involving domestic abuse, it shall be the duty of the first peace officer who interviews the victim of the domestic abuse to inform the victim of the twenty-four-hour statewide telephone communication service established by Section 3-314 of Title 43A of the Oklahoma Statutes and to give notice to the victim of certain rights. The notice shall consist of handing such victim the following statement: "As a victim of domestic abuse, you have certain rights. These rights are as follows:
1. The right to request that charges be pressed against your assailant;
2. The right to request protection from any harm or threat of harm arising out of your cooperation with law enforcement and prosecution efforts as far as facilities are available and to be provided with information on the level of protection available;
3. The right to be informed of financial assistance and other social services available as a result of being a victim, including information on how to apply for the assistance and services; and
4. The right to file a petition for a protective order or, when the domestic abuse occurs when the court is not open for business, to request an emergency temporary protective order."


To file for a protective order in Oklahoma, you can download the forms online at http://www.oscn.net/static/forms/aoc_forms/protectiveorders.asp. You can file a petition with the court without an attorney, but you must have solid evidence that you need one. Witness accounts constitute as evidence in a court of law, but as I have learned recently, witnesses will lie. You need pictures, video, audio, receipts; anything that will back up your claims and be indisputable in a court of law.

When in a domestic violence situation, victims rarely take photographs of their injuries. They're afraid that their abuser will find them and punish them even more. I understand the fear. But evidence can help protect you and though a protective order may not stop your attacker, it will deter him. If you don't want the photos in your home, have a close friend or relative take pictures for you.

Above all, never give up on yourself. You deserve better. No matter what you are told on a daily basis, God didn't create a mistake in you. You have a better future waiting. Reach out for help through Gary if you're in Colorado at http://www.victimprotection.org/ or you can find resources and help in your area through The Weaker Vessel or Survivors in Action.

Have a blessed day!